Never laugh at Your Wife’s Choices …
(You are one of them…)
Never be Proud of Your Choices…
(Your Wife is one of them…)
Archive for the ‘ Jokes ’ Category
| Love Marriage | Arranged Marriage |
|---|---|
| Resembles procedural programming language. We have some set of functions like flirting, going to movies together, making long conversations on phone and then try to fit all functions to the candidate we like. | Similiar to Object Oriented Programming (OOP) approach. We first fix the candidate and then try to implement functions on her. The functions are added to supplement the main program. The function can be added or deleted. |
| Family system hangs because hardware (called parents) is not responding. | Compatible with hardware (Parents) |
| You are the project leader so you are responsible for implementation and execution of PROJECT – married life. | You are a team member under project leader (parents) so they are responsible for successful execution of project – Married Life. |
| Client expectations include exciting feature as spouse cooking food, washing clothes etc. | All these features are covered in the SRS (System Required Sepecification) as required features. |
| Love Marriage is like Windows, beautiful and seductive… Yet one never knows when it will crash… if crashes that’s the end. | Arranged Marriage is like Unix… Boring n colorless but still extremely reliable and robust. May crash but easy to recover. |
Filed under:
Marriage(s)
| Jiya Jale jaan jale, Raat bhar dhuan chale | FEVER |
| Tadap tadap ke is dil se aah nikalti rahi | HEART ATTACK |
| Juda hoke bhi tu mujhme kanhi baaki hai | CONSTIPATION |
| Bidi jalayile jigar se piya jigar ma badi aag hai | ACIDITY |
| Tujhme rab dikhta hai yaara main kya karoon | CATARACT |
| Tujhe yaad na meri aayi kisi se ab kya kahna | ALZHEIMER |
| Mann dole mera tann dole | VERTIGO |
| Tip tip barsa paani, paani ne aag lagayee | BURNING SENSATION WHILE URINATING |
| Dil Dhadak Dhadak ke keh raha hai | HIGH BP |
| Aaj Kal Paaon Zameen per nahin padte mere | CORN ON FEET |
| Haay re haay Neend nahin aaye | INSOMNIA |
Filed under:
Doctor/Patient
A man will pay Rs. 200 for a Rs. 100 item he needs.
A woman will pay Rs. 100 for a Rs. 200 item she doesn’t need.
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all.
Married men live longer than single man, but married men are a lot more willing to die.
Scary but quite true:
Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy
Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Marriage
Smart Boss + Smart Employee = Profit
Smart Boss + Dumb Employee = Production
Dumb Boss + Smart Employee = Promotion
Dumb Boss + Dumb Employee = Overtime
Filed under:
Boss/Employer/Employee, Men/Women